Im doing it.

http://www.scarymommy.com/being-good-enough-mom/

The article above has its merits. I can get very frustrated being a work at home mom. I understand this article in the way that some days (ok, most..) I feel like all I can be is 'good nuff'. My baby is alive, I am alive, the house is standing.. we are good. But that's not the life that I want to live. I think that we were created for more than this. more than just getting through the next day, because we all know its going to be pretty similar to the last.

More often then not, I am just getting through. And I go to ask my friends for advice and they can't give me any. They all say that what I do is way more than any normal person can handle. Is this true? Am I crazy? Am I really doing all this stuff I say I am doing?

I think I google about my problems five times a day and I still can't find anyone who can share a similiar story or have advice that works for my strange life. I figured, "well then I guess I have to write a blog."

Maybe there's more mommies out there screaming for help (or googling) and cant seem to find any. I want to create a space with good advice on how to juggle being a mom and a business woman and a wife and doing it all while looking and feeling fabulous! I like that dream. I see it so vividly, I can feel that God put this in my bones. I want to live a life worth living. I want to help other mommies and wives do the same thing. Let's celebrate our hard work. Let's cry together. Laugh together. Let's be super-women.. BECAUSE WE CAN!

It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be so worth it! Here are some topics I would like to write about. Feel free to add any others that you think of in the comments.

• super nanny
• attitude
• example
• post partum depression
• super mom
• stay at home mom
• working mom
• christian attitude
• hardworking
• mommy/wifey mission statement
• balance
• relationships-friendships 
• gift giving

Blogal vomit part two ( some healing )

I got slapped in the face. Hard. Just now.
My last post was two years ago and the question posed was,
"In two years, how will your life be any different?"

Whoa. How is my life different?

It is totally different from two years ago and also I am the same in many ways.
(up until now)

It is drastically different in the way we thought our business is going, God had opened some doors for us that we didn't even know where an option two years ago. He gave us a radio show, which has just been a really big blessing for us. We aren't making money off it, and we don't really know if anyone is listening or not... But we really have fun doing it! Scott loves to write and be creative, so this gets him into doing that every day. He is really opening up deep again with his writing, and I am excited to see what the Lord has in store for Scott. I like doing the radio with him because I get to sit with Mr.Black and give him cues and time cues and high fives during the breaks. I don't really do much, but he says that I am a big help, so I am happy to do it!

Our family is now drastically different. We now have a baby who is 15 months old, and the light of our lives. He really is a little bundle of joy. He is one of the happiest babies I have ever seen. He is so inquisitive and smart. I really think he understands a lot more than we think he does. I heard the other day, " Two year olds speak half English and half God." I love this saying so much. It's so true. Benaiah is learning about every single thing in his life right now, every aspect of living in this world is pouring into his Godly little brain. I believe that he can see spirits, I really do. He is such a beam of light. The only explanation I have of him is that he is truly a miracle baby... I know that now more than ever.

Some things that are similar: Our housing situation is very similar to what we were going through two years ago. Two years ago, we were evicted from our dream home, Now, two years later, we are facing another eviction fora nother foreclosure. Except this time the guy we were renting from had just been pocketing our money and he got the house taken away. Been searching for a home for my family for a month and half now and we keep getting turned down at every place. Two years ago when we had to move, we had no clue where we would go. At the last possible moment, (the day before we were moving) God gave us a temporary home. I am praying that He delivers us again, and no matter where we go, he delivers us into some rest.

Two years ago in June I found out I was pregnant with my first baby. What a weird time that was for me. So filled with anger and uncertainty. I had no clue what was to become of me, as a mother, and taking care of a child! And working! I didn't know how I was going to do it. And come to think of it,  I still dont hahah. I am getting better at managing six hats at once, but I have the dooming feeling that I just can't take it anymore. At least just not right now. I found out I was pregnant again about a month ago. I was actually really happy this time. I was just as scared as the first time, but I knew that there was a beautiful soul at the end of all of it, and it was so amazing on so many levels. Benaiah could have a sibling to grow up with, I could be a full time stay at home mom and focus on my babies and healing myself.
a Week ago, On My birthday, April 3rd,  I lost that baby... Hands down this has been the most painful experience I have gone through thus far in my life. The actual miscarriage was physically painful, but the emotional pain I feel is just so overwhelming at times. I wanted to just stop the world so I could cry and get it all out. Luckily I have some amazing girlfriends that also have been through this, who let me scream and cry and laugh and sccream some more at them. They understand. And I still feel so alone with it. I am just supposed to move on. Get on with life, there is so much going on around my family and I, that there isn't time for me to stop and grieve right now. that is why Iam writing this little blog here. I want to let some of this go, and I can come back to it a little while later.

I know that my God will deliver me and my family through all of this, and all the Glory will be His. Through the ups and downs and the impossibles, He always has been there and always will be there.

I am on the edge of my seat, here... I can't wait to see what happens next!

What if?..

What if you only had 

TWO YEARS to LIVE?

Would anything about your daily life be different?

ITS HERE! ITS HERRREEE!!!

EXCITING THINGS HAPPENING!!


I Cannot begin to express the feelings I have stirring in my and around me. We are on the edge of something BIG TIME here... With our Like It Matters.. With our lives!!!

Here is a little sneak peak into what we have been up to these past couple of months.. Here is our NEW Mission Statement (a rough draft, mind you!!!)

Like It Matters

Instititute of Mulitple Intellect

Mission Statement

TURN ON YOUR BRAIN

We are COMMITTED to assist our TEAM members in MAXIMIZING the POTENTIALS they were created with.  We will do this by;

ü     Identifying and quantifying their INNATE MULTIPLE INTELLECTS.

ü     Passionately delivering TRANSFORMATIONAL LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT training; Experiencing Leadership in Motion.

ü     Coaching; Instilling and installing- the knowledge and patterns needed to become…ALL YOU WERE CREATED TO BE!

…Individually and organizationally….

I AM - COMMITTED to do this with Passion; Heart, Body and Soul!

begin.

It is the first week of 2014, and I really am SHOOTING out of the gates this week!

During our Christmas break, I literally SHUT OFF my mind in hopes to regroup and relax a little. It turns out, when I completely turn off my mind, I tend to do things (or NOT do things) that I didn't want to do, or isn't a part of the person that I want to be anymore. After some arguments, tantrums and way too many tears, I have committed to taking control of my mind again.

I learned some amazing things in the year of 2013. I learned a lot of things that will help me mentally and physically, and I also learned a lot of things that I shouldn't do anymore... or ever. I would like to believe that I am not crazy, so I will change my pattern for the year of 2014.

UP UNTIL NOW.. A big pattern of mine would be to start something but never finish it. I started this blog with the best intentions of writing in it every week and giving awesome updates about our Leadership Classes. And then I dwindled down and got lost in "aaalllll" of the stuff I "had" to do. I have been doing a lot of planning-thinking about how exactly I could set myself up for the success that I want to see in myself. This blog is just another thing in my life to show me that I will finish what I start, and that includes MY GOALS.

My goals are not just.. tasks. These are things that I will be constantly achieving and changing in every aspect of my life. One of my biggest "wants" out of life is that I want to be closest to the person that I was put here to be. I want to be that perfect shining star that God had in mind with me when I was made.

I will post these later this week. I would like to see how these morph even more once we start class LIM 128 in Dallas this week!

travel stories.. coming soon

We come this way but once.

We can either tiptoe through life
and hope we get to death without being badly bruised

or we can live a full, complete life
achieving our goals and realizing our wildest dreams.

- Bob Proctor

In a week... ish.

Two steps beyond the edge
I can't undo this leap of faith
Takes my breath away

So high above the ground
You've got me hanging in mid air
Between here and there
Now all I have is You

(IN ONE WEEK.. ISH) I will be back in London on our SECOND missions trip! This time it is without an organization that is sending us, we are just going because we feel called. This time we are MAPPING out what our role will be in London. Honestly, from the bottom of my heart.. I just want to help people. Whether that be by giving someone a smile, some money or some counseling.. Maybe even directions. I don't care. I just want to be Jesus to other people. However I am needed. I will be there.

It will also be our One YEAR wedding anniversary! HOORAY! Its been one year.. It feels like its been five. I feel like its been forever, its hard and sometimes painful to remember who I was before I met my Husband. Its been a rough year, but its also been an amazing year. Things didn't pan out like we thought they would, and people came and went. But we stuck together, and we worked though some difficult things that most people never touch. We have done over 15 classes, and touched many people's lives. We have shattered the belief system of what love really is. I love him so much and he really works hard everyday to become a better person and a better husband. I am working hard to be the most excellent wife that there is.. I want to be the best for HIM!

So back to IN ONE WEEK.... We will be in Europe, heading off on this fantastic journey that God has us on. It is kind of like standing on the edge of a cliff, knowing that someone will slightly tap your shoulder to let you know that it is time to free fall. Then your head starts to lean towards the edge of the cliff, bringing the rest of your body weight gently forward. Free falling into the beautiful unknown.


If I just believe my eyes
I'd see I should be terrified
But I'm so alive

I don't know how or when
But I believe that You'll come through
Lord, I'm trusting You
Can't wait to see what You will do

I can't wait to see how vastly different our life will be in just three weeks. When we get back from Europe, we will be doing back to back Awakening classes, and... WOW ... Through all of the learnings we will get from our mission trip, and then all of the things we will be trained in and learning in India.. Those people who will be in these October Awakening classes will receive something special. Wow. I just cant wait to see what God will do in those classes. It will be a fantastic information overload! :)

For now, the day dreaming has started. We have already started packing and the butterflies have already started to fly around my stomach. Our whole lives are about to change.. I am ready for the freefall.

Thinking I can fly but I know it's You
Got me up here, no fear, no tears
Mind's clear 'cause I know You're here
Can't wait to see what You will do

blogal vomit

Where do I start?

My little Road Warrior

Like It Matters just got back from Minneapolis, Minnesota, and we had a great class! There were 10 men and 1 woman in the class! It was great, the energy was amazing in that meeting room that weekend. The class shifted to a positive energy a lot quicker than normal and it ROCKED from early on!
We drove from Texas to Minnesota, and it was my first time to Minneapolis. It was a nice drive, only about 15 ish hours with a night in Iowa. We got to go to dinner with some old friends at the Iowa Stater and just relax! There isn't a lot of time for that, so it was really good to enjoy it with some graduates that we havent seen in years!

Before the class, we got to go to the Mall of America! I've always wanted to go there, mainly because I had American Girl dolls, and I always wanted to go to the store! So I did :)

 Currently, we are back in Texas.. Gearing up for the battle of October that is ahead. I am so excited and nervous for the month of October. I am excited that it is finally fall and I will be able to wear scarves and jackets again! I love to bundle up now... When  I lived in California, the summer was always my favorite time of year.. As the years go by, I am finding myself praying for the cool air to come sooner.

I am finding myself overwhelmed by the coming events in our lives. Our one year wedding anniversary is coming up in two weeks! We will be in London, then to India , then Sacramento then Arizona. I am excited for everything that is about to happen in our lives... We are about to be making some huge changes to our lives, and our company. We will not being doing so many Awakening classes like how we have been doing forever and ever. I will have more information on this when we get back from India, but I am EXCITED to share with you all about the amazing new things God has in store for us!!!

Team LIM-123

So we have two weeks to prepare for our month long excursion. Getting things together like our luggage and paperwork is easy.. I am talking about PREPARATION.  I have started my Paleo diet (the same one I did before our wedding) today, and Scott started his HCG diet. We are starting to go back to the gym tomorrow, and Im going to go hardcore on the StairMaster!!! :)

I am also talking about preparation of my mind and spirit. I have found in the past that my anxiety could get the best of me during times of stress like this. Over the summer, I went to get certified as a Practitioner of NLP, and I did a "phobia cure" process with a gentleman from Brazil. My "phobia" was that I would get crippling anxiety before Awakening Classes, or when I was preparing for them. The anxiety came mostly from deep seated feelings of not being good enough, always failing at the projects I started and the guttural feeling of getting in big trouble. So Gilberto, the gentleman from Brazil did a process on me, where he literally TOOK that icky feeling from my body. I felt empty inside after. He said  that I would feel like this because that feeling has been there for so long, my body used it as a defense mechanism. It was a good thing.
And my anxiety is gone. Just gone. Its the strangest feeling, because there isnt a feeling there. So preparing for this big push ahead of me is giving me a strange feeling that I cannot put my finger on. I am very calm about everything about to happen, yet I feel like I should be anxious.

Also to prepare for our "battle"... I am starting to study.. A LOT. everything. Im going over my NLP manual, I am reading and obsessing over dermatoglyphics.. I want to learn everything there is to know about fingerprints and handreading. I am so excited about this... I just cant wait to see how this all unfolds.. I am finding out more and more that when I know how I can be "unresourceful", or if there is something I do not like about myself, I can change it. Yes, It's great that I can find out about my genetics, but that does not determine who I choose to be. I may be PRONE for depression, but when I know how my mind and body is wired, I can and will change those things. Which brings me to my next point..

I have been slipping lately on my own thoughts. UP UNTILL NOW... I havent done a very good job with dealing with my "stinking thinking". I have allowed negative thinking about myself and its manifesting into me being in a bad mood. I have not been on guard with my own mind, and I feel so bad about it. I will not beat myself up, though. I will make the commitment right now to take charge again. There is SO MUCH ahead of me and my family, so many big changes... I want to play BIG, guys. I want to do BIG BIG things!!! And I know that if I do amazing things with my life, I will need to have a positive mindset and a healthy love for myself. I commit to loving myself, so I can love other people MORE.

Chunk number 1.. JUNE

Wow.. SUMMER!... It's almost over!! HAHA! These last couple of months really have gone by in the blink of an eye. SO much has happened that needs to be documented, So I have to do this by bite sized chunks...

On our drive to California.. I think this is by Coachella

JUNE..

The start of our crazy summer. The first week, Scott and I drove from Texas to Orange County, CA. The drive was okay, we stopped in Pheonix after 17 hours of drivin. Some graduates of ours threw us a little BBQ, it was so nice seeing so many people I rarely get to see!
It was a great class, we had a couple of people from Sacramento in there as well. It was another small,  but powerful class.

The day after we got back from our road trip, we left for London. Scott and I were very excited to be going on our first Missions trip together. It was absolutely amazing, in some parts. The trip took an unexpected turn when we starting clashing with the other members of our group. Half way during the trip, due to be treated worse than dirt, we resigned from that church we used to belong to. It's just sad, I really understand why people shy away from religion. Most say they want to help the hurting and broken, most sing those songs that say "give me Your eyes so I can see"... But they don't mean one word of it. It doesn't matter someones position in life, their religion or skin color.. Jesus calls us to LOVE.

Jesus also tells us to be like children.. So we also ran around being weird.

So Scott and I did just so.  Anyone that came in our path we engaged with. Some people would look away, some would nod.. And then there were the people that we got to reach out to... People who were just looking for some understanding. People who wanted someone to vent to. People who needed money or food. People who just need a HUG... Those are the moments that made the trip worth while. While the rest of the group was skyping and facebooking at local cafes, Scott and I stood on the sidewalks. We smiled and said hello to people. We got to have deep conversations with people who were upset. We got to pray with people. We got to buy people food. We got to help people, and always got to share the gospel.

I realized that loving people is more simple than most want to make it out to be. Scott and I were Available and Committed to whoever was in front of us. Boom. That's it. That is how you help people. You are there for them, (available), and You commit to helping them in whatever way is resourceful for that person! SIMPLE! When people realize that I don't want anything back from them, that is when their hearts open to the idea that there IS a Living God that loves them. That's why He sends people into our lives everyday to either help build us up, or help chisel away at the un-resourceful things.

London was amazing, and when we got back home we had a couple of weeks off to rest. We then went to Sacramento on a business trip, and it was GREAT! We got to visit some friends at K-LOVE/ Air1 and got to see the studio. We had some amazing dinners with some awesome Graduates and I also got to go to a Comedy Show with Sierra Nevada! But that was in July.. So I will save that for my July chunkie post :)


For more information/pictures about our London Missions trip, go to

www.unchainedjf.org

We will be going back at the end of September, without a sponsoring church. We are scratching and clawing to pay for this all, so we are accepting whatever kind of donations anyone wants to give! We need money to buy food, train tickets and things like clothes and blankets to give to the homeless.

I believe this is above Lake Tahoe

oct.24,2011

I found this while I was cleaning out my old room here at my house. I used to live in the now guest room in our house before Scott and I got married. People don't understand that we did this on purpose, we wanted to honor God by honoring the "rules" and wanted to SHOW our kids what is the right thing to do!

Anyways, I found this in my old room from a speech class I took in college when I moved back to California a year or so ago.

I had ten minutes to write a commemorative speech. Here it is

There was a time in my life where my whole world looked so dark, and all I was searching for was a light. The candle inside of my heart was no longer burning. Then there was a man God put into my llife to re-light my flame and passion for living my life.
  He imprinted a belief system inside of me that I live my life by everyday, "When you live your life like it matters.. it does!" He has helped me find my purpose in life and continues to encourage me not only to dream, but to dream it and then LIVE it!
He is a man of great passion and a fire for helping people change thier lives for the better. He leadsa life of purpose by serving his God by serving other people. He gives selflessly to others by giving them his Heart Body and Soul in everything he does.
- His Name is Scott V. Black, and he is the leader of my life, a mentor and my best friend. He brought back my love and passion for my own life, as well as helped me find my passion and fire to help other people. . He helped me realize and believe that my life truly matters.


I love this speech. I love it because it still stands true today. While I was typing this up, I really wanted to add more to it :) Perhaps I will write up something like this and add to it each year! Man, speaking of such, I need a GREAT idea for a Valentines day gift to make my husband this year!

I am up to ideas!

-<3 v.b.

FEB FIVES

@beautifulurself

EXCITED:

1. To continue to be working hard to make our home a comfortable and lovely place to be. I am making baby steps, and am seeing progress finally!

2. To work hard today in my office, and then get to work on a couple of different projects after!

3. That Scott and I got so much stuff done this past weekend! We both worked hard together on cleaning, and it felt good! You could call it PRE-spring cleaning! :)

4. To have had more opportunities to read more because I have been waking up earlier in the mornings

5. For our February being our month of regrouping, getting ready for what God has in front of us! BIG THINGS!

6. For our concerts we are going to this month and next.

GRATEFUL:

1. For the internet when it is used in a positive manner. I love how I can listen to ANY Christian artist I want, for free. I love that I can read every version of the bible online, I love that I can inspire and bring good words to people through Facebook. I am grateful that we are aware of the battles in this world, and we can fight it with GOOD WORDS and the Good Word!

2. For my Husband. My wonderfully under-construction husband! I am grateful that he works diligently every day to change old patterns, create new ones, and working hard to be closer to the man and Husband of God he wants to be. I am grateful I am married to someone who learns from his mistakes, and moves forward in a positive direction! I am just so grateful that God made him ffor me! I am grateful that I get to be his wife!

3. For the hard work I get to do today and this week and the rest of my life. I am NOT looking for easy! I am NOT looking for ordinary! only EXTRAORDINARY!

4. For our wonderful little big family. I am grateful that I got to teach Christian how to paint with watercolors last night without him knowing what I was doing. I helped him with a school project, as well as teach him about the wonderufl world of ART! So awesome, I really miss doing art!

5. For this day.. This is the day the Lord has made, and I will be GLAD AND REJOICE in it!!! 

Bushido

Good morning, Warriors.

YES! Warriors!

I think people often get confused on why we chose to call ourselves Warriors. When you think of what a warrior is, what comes to your mind? Maybe a barbaric image of a caveman holding a club.. Maybe its of a Solider, fighting for his country.. Maybe it's a Samurai warrior wielding a sword, running into the battle.

"The unwritten Samurai code of conduct, known as Bushido, held that the true warrior must hold that loyalty, courage, veracity, compassion, and honor as important, above all else. An appreciation and respect of life was also imperative, as it added balance to the warrior character of the Samurai. He was often very stoic with a deep and strong philosophical passion. He could be deadly in combat and yet so gentle and compassionate with children and the weak."

Thats how I see us. Warriors running into a battle. No armor on the back. Fighting the enemy through hard work and dedication. I see us in that way, but not wanting to hurt anybody.. We are warriors in a different sense, fighting the enemy of the spirit. Battling through the tough stuff to stand for our beliefs.

There is a war constantly happening.. This war might not be something you are aware of, even.
This war is deadly, this war can break up marriages and families.. This war can tear friends apart.

It's the war of the mind.
It's the war of the spirit.

I am under constant assault of my mind and soul. I struggle on a daily basis with wanting to be liked, and with depression. I struggle through the stresses of this world, the bills and the hard work. I struggle with my walk with my God when other Christians want to tell me how far I have fallen.. Or what a victim I am! "Poor Valerie, she's just a little girl.. She can't handle this!"

And then I laugh.

And I laugh hard! We ALL struggle with these things, I am just more open about it!
My future husband and I are consciously working everyday in the battlefield of our mind and soul. I have to be on guard for these things, because when I go on "auto-pilot" and just go through the motions of life, I always open my eyes at the point of feeling so low and say "What is going on here? Why am I depressed?"

I know why.. I haven't been on guard lately. I have been nose to the grindstone, get through this day! I have had so many struggles and when I reach out to people I get burned in the end. I found this verse today and it really speaks to me.

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)

The path I will take in life is all determined by what is in my heart. And my heart was being shoved in the wrong place of wanting to be liked!! This is a big thing I am working on to get out of my life. I mostly do not care what other people think about me, but it is human nature to want fellow humans to accept you.
This is where the battle comes in.

This is where I go into my mind and figure out what is true, and what is holding me back. Here is some truths:

It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. 

Psalm 118:8 (NLT)

 DUH. Thank you, God. I have wanted so bad to take refuge in a friend. I have wanted so bad to connect with fellow Christians. I really understand why people are so afraid of religion. Most Chrisitans do not remember this Psalm, and its the VERY MIDDLE of the Bible! 

I am a Warrior. A Dedicated, Loud, 100% committed Warrior for our God.

I will not be stopped by man on our mission to Awaken the people of this Earth. 

No Armor on the back.

fives for thursday

EXCITED:

1. I got up this morning feeling good! I feel like I lost five pounds haha
2. To have Christian music playing in my office and house 24/7
3. That I get to see if my rice method took the moisture out of my iphone later today! *crosses fingers*
4. To be drinking lots of WATER! Cleanse me!!!!
5. To be feeling motivated and organized and focused for work today!!!

GRATEFUL:

1.That the majority of the time I have a great attitude about life.
2. That God gave me the ability to smile through the tough stuff
3. For these pablano peppers filled with hash browns
4. That God loves me enough to love me even if I do something wrong
5. That my Mommy loves me so muxh

1. That I got to MAKE my Warrior relax yesterday.. He deserves a day of rest!!

My Fives, July 18, 2012

In our Leadership Awakening classes, we give our students some "homework" to do in the mornings. The homework is to write out 5 things you are excited about and 5 things you are grateful for. This serves lots of purposes, but the main one is to set your mind right! If you start doing your "fives" in the morning, you set your RAS (reticulator activating system, which a stem in your brain where your focus comes from.. basically.) to something GREAT instead of dreading what is going to happen that day or tomorrow.

So I will be posting my FIVES, as much as I can. Here are mine from today!


Five things Im EXCITED about:

1. We get to go to the water park today! I am excited to be in the water and get a tan!
2. We got our For King and Country CD in the mail yesterday! I love those Aussies!
3. Scott and I got our plane tickets for our honeymoon and just put more money down on the trip! WE only owe a little bit more on the vacation, and then we can start saving up for spending moneys!
4. I am excited for our Sacramento class next week, I have some awesome people coming out to staff with me and IM SO EXCITED!
5. My gym membership, and how I actually have been using it! And it makes me feel good!

Five things Im GRATEFUL for:

1. That the God of the Universe loves me enough to be intimately involved in my life!
2. For the love of my future husband, Scott. Even when we butt heads, He always comes back to give me a hug and tells me he loves me. LOVE IS AN ACTION! And my future Husband is full of action!
3. That we have been in our house for so long, I am grateful we are being forced out of here so we can find a NEW place for our NEW family and NEW life together!
4. Red nail polish. I dont know why, but it just makes me happy to be a woman!
5. My little fuzzy kitten Sargent Fuzzy Boots. Hes just SO FUZZY! He knows when we are sad, and he always wants to make us feel good too!

Stars

I feel calm.

Yesterday we got a "foreclosure" note in the mail about our house. Usually when these things happen, I would have the feeling on my heart in my throat.. Tightness in chest, shortness of breath.. But yesterday after opening the FOUR identical letters from the mortgage company, I felt nothing. Not in a bad way, like I was numb, but more of a feeling like it doesn't even matter. It doesn't matter if we get kicked out of our house. It doesn't matter that the economy sucks and our business hasnt been doing well for the last couple of years.

Its a peace that surpasses all understanding. I know that we will be taken care of. It is SO amazing to have this feeling, especially when things like getting past due bills in the mail, or a foreclosure notice. I feel like we are being handfed by the God of the universe. Things might be tight, things might SEEM like they are falling apart, but I cannot shake the feeling that something HUGE is about to happen. Its like the Sidewalk Prophet's song,


"Make empty
So I can be filled
‘Cause I’m still holding
Onto my will
And I’m completed
When you are with me
Make me empty"

Scott always says, "He is the God that gives and takes away, and even when He takes away, He still gives us so much." I really get this now. It seems like everyday a new struggle or problem gets presented to us. But its okay, it always gets handled in the most awesome way. I never understood before doing our Leadership Awakening classes that sometimes God needs to take everything out of us (or around us) so the only thing we can be filled up with is Him. It's our "dirty sponge philosophy" in motion. The only thing that can come out of a dirty sponge is what we put IN it. And in order to put nice clean water in a old dirty sponge, we gotta get rid of all the crap that we have put in it before.

 "Til You are my one desire
‘Til You are my one true love
‘Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me"

I want to be everything I can be for my God, for my future Husband and my future children. I think that the Good Lord put all this stuff in front of us for a good reason! Some people have been calling me extreme, or telling me that I have changed.. They are right. I have changed.

Two years ago, if this happend to me I would probably sleep all day, not wanting to deal with it. I would probably drink my worries away. I would probably be destructive 'because it doesnt matter anyways'. I would say, who cares?

This new me.. Im okay with it but for different reasons. I am okay becasue I can be sober and deal with my problems because I serve  GREAT GOD. I am passionate about everything I do and say. If I seem to aggressive its because IM PASSIONATE! I would rather be alive and loud and crazy then dead and quiet!

Life Lesson: They were right. All you need is LOVE.

Testimonials

God gave us a incredible week!

We just got back from Anthem, Arizona (Phoenix) on Sunday night after doing a Leadership Awakening class there for a church. Wow. The class was a struggle initially, but as always, the end result was just mind blowing! It was our second ever Awakening we did for a church, and let me tell you.. Sunday church service at The New Creation Community Church was AMAZING. It was full of heart, deep soul provoking thoughts and real honesty from all of the church body. People stood up in front of everybody and confessed their idols and asked to be held accountable and we danced and cried out during worship. It truly was full of heart, body and soul.

During this week, we have gotten the chance to peek into the impact the training has had on the graduates from Arizona. There are ten more people in this world that have a fire burning deep in their hearts and souls to change this world for the better. There are ten more people in this world with new eyes to see the broken and the hurting, and with new hands and feet to help them out! Here is a testimonial from the bass player in the worship band.. I just LOVE the way he describes the way the training had a impact on him!

Recommendation Letter.

Being able to be a part of Team 105, in the Like it Matters program, completely changed the way I see the world.

I walked into this with preconceived notions, that were all incorrect, and found not only a new direction to walk, but much more importantly… How to walk it!

I have been playing music in the church band as a bass player for a couple of years, although playing music is always fun, and being on stage was always exciting, I never knew how good it can be when you learn how to let God take over and just “be” in the moment. No more looking at the Music, counting time, worrying about the next note, making sure the stops are clean. A little into the first song and I realized God was playing and I was just a bystander. The Music flowed from my heart, not my head.

Learning how to “turn off” my mind, and let God take over, is a tool I will carry with me forever! Each time I get the chance to use this tool, it keeps getting easier also. Using this in my business, my ministry, and my music makes everything make sense and So much more impactful on those around me. A fun byproduct of the class, is when those you see every day in business, ask you what happened as you seem so much happier!

I have been to Sales seminars, leadership classes, tech trainings, and management schools… None of which really changed anything other than a few techniques… Like It Matters, Changed EVERYTHING for me, and showed that it really DOES matter!

 - Trace Tolby, Anthem, AZ


HOW COOL IS THIS!? I just am beside myself when I get to read letters that people send us like this. God CHOSE me to help with this company. God chose each one of us for a special purpose. And This gets to be my special purpose! I am so blessed.

Reminders

I have learned over the past two years that I have a very unique life. My  schedule, my patterns and my perspective on life in general is vastly different than most people I have met. This isn't a bad thing.. In fact, I wouldn't trade this craziness for anything else.

I own and help run a Leadership Training company. Our training is so intense, so unique, that when people who have gone to many different trainings "like ours" over the years always say, "This was the toughest, yet most powerful thing I have ever done in my entire life." I get to do this at least twice a month! Our trainings run 2 and a half days, from six o clock in the morning to 1 to 3 in the morning! We are not surface dwellers.. We go deep into people's own belief systems and things that have been holding them back from being the people they want to be. We are SCUBA divers, as we like to say. People in our class get the chance to let go of past demons, past experiences, and belief systems that have been haunting them their whole lives, up until now. These are people who, to the rest of the World, look like they have it all! MBA's, PhD's, White picket fences, perfect marriages, 2.5 kids and the perfect car... And when they go through class, I get to expeiernce that even if people LOOK like they have the perfect happy life, 99.9 percent of the time, they always can be better. They can be better spouses, parents and employers/employees.

It's so hard to describe our training unless you have already been through the Leadership Awakening class. My last paragraph totally did not do our classes any justice, but it wil have to do for now until I find better words. It's difficult to describe a life changing expiernce. It's hard to explain that no matter how good people are doing, we could always be better. It's weird to explain how almost every person on God's green Earth has someTHING holding them back.. Whether it be some bad epcxience that happened to them when they were younger, or a bad belief system playing over and over in thier heads, we all have JUNK. We like to call these BLOCKS to Leadership. Things that are holding us back from being the very very best person we can be.

My reasoning for this blog is simple. LIVES CHANGE in our training. Time STOPS. We run out of breath, we SPEND ourselves in a worthy cause. We give 100% of our HEART, BODY AND SOUL to the NOW moment. We give everything in ourselves, so we can get so much more in return. I lose track of time, three days feels like 2 weeks! I have been telling myself I need to document these things that happen with us. and UP UNTILL NOW, I have given myself the excuse that I just dont have enough time.. ENOUGH! Enough with that bad B.S. (belief system), Val! Everyone has the same amount of time.. I just NOW am choosing how to better handle my time in my days on this Planet.

I am excited to be documenting our crazy life.. Our AMAZING experiences in class, (while walking gingerly of course, as I commit to confidentiality to what students say and or do in class), getting ready for class, and after the classes are over. I am excited to be able to look back and see all of the things we do. I need to constantly remind myself what we are doing MATTERS.